The Power of Patience
Patience pertains to every phase as we work through our adoptions. It could be a physical that can't get scheduled, a pile of paperwork that just doesn't seem to get smaller, that darn I-171 that STILL hasn't shown up, the home study that seems to be taking months to wrap-up, the wait for a referral, the wait for a court date, and finally the last wait is to physically wrap our arms around our babies and place our lips on their skin for the first time and give them the kiss we have been dreaming of for so long. I need to hold on to these teachings and do the best I can and pray the prayer of Patience.
"For you have need of steadfast patience and endurance, so that you may perform and fully accomplish the will of God, and thus receive and carry away [and enjoy to the full] what is promised. ”Hebrews 10:36
The Word of God promises that the patient man will be perfect and entire, lacking nothing. (James 1:4 KJV.) A patient man is a powerful man. He can remain calm in the storm. He has control over his mouth. His thoughts remain loving in times when people's behavior becomes challenging.
Without patience we cannot endure to see the fulfillment of our faith. Everything does not come to us immediately upon believing. There is a waiting period involved in receiving from God. It is during that period that our faith is tested and purified. Only if we endure and wait patiently will we experience the joy of seeing what we have believed for.
Patience is not only the ability to wait, but also the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting. Waiting is a part of life that cannot be avoided. We will spend a great deal of our lives waiting; if we don't learn to do it well (patiently), we will be quite miserable. God is so patient with us. And we are to imitate Him.
Be encouraged to actively pursue patience it will lead you into God's power
Pray This:
"Lord, help me to exercise every kind of endurance and patience, perseverance, and forbearance with joy (Colossians 1:11). In Jesus' name, amen."
Friday, November 30, 2007
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Clarity is a good thing
Clarity brings peace and calm; however their still may be feelings of dissapointment and emotion....today I feel all of these.
I had a great conversation with our family coordinator yesterday and feel I learned of several things that are so helpful in this journey of the unknown. Knowing ANYTHING helps the wait and the anticipaition and the planning. Gaining a better understanding of how things are working and moving forward has helped me SOOOO much. Even though the news is not exactly what my heart wants, that's o.k. because it is all in His timing and I am trusting fully in that. So, especially for you YG friends I hope this sheds some light and clarity for you as well. I think if anything we will have a better way of watching and gauging how and when referrals might come along.
-The agency's main focus right now is to get all the referred families through their court dates successfully. I completelly agree that this has to be the main focus. So after Dec. 7, G-man will be focused on getting the 2nd group their dates, and probably preparing for the first group to travel. I asked if there would be any referrals in between those two court dates. The answer is most likely no, but possibly. It really seems to depend on the workload of G-man and if he feels he has the bandwidth to do that. Again, his focus will be on the first 2 groups of families.
-It sounds like G-man has hired some staff to help him (YEAH!!!) and he will be gettting them ready so that he can eventually task them with some of the things he has had to do, thus giving them the opportunity to do more things simultaneously (This is my interpretation). I will be praying that he finds this great staff and if they are already hired, than I pray for their ability and their hearts for how much good and help they are providing. Also, so that G-man doesn't have to be the one man show (must be exhausting)
-O.K., so IF there was time to do some referrals in December (again, sounds unlikely), there would only be able to be 4 children referred. The transitional home holds up to 16 babies.....there are 12 there now. I asked why not have referrals come as soon as court dates start happening successfully and those new referred babies would stay at the original orphanages for a short time, as they did before the TH. I learned this is not possible as ET adoption guidlines state that an agaency MUST have a transitional home. They are not allowed to stay at the orphanges as soon as they are referred. There is a grace period given to the agencies when they begin working with ET, America World's grace period is over, and great thing that our transitional home is up and running (probably why their haven't been more referrals as G-man was again the main person setting this home up and now we know it was probably pretty time-critical). So, if there are 16 children in the TH they are not even able to get more referrals. So, for us waiting families and those who will be there soon, this is a great piece of information as we can watch the TH for children leaving/coming to better gauge the flow of more referrals. Also, Rachel is there now helping and when she moves there, this home will no longer be on G-man's plate. Also, as G-man gets his new staff up and running, their hope is to eventually have things going really smoothly and the TH home will essentaully have a revloving door as famlies come get their little angels and new referrals enter.
-I also know exactly where I am on the waiting list, not only by # dossier submitted but, what the requests are before me. We were the 21st dossier submitted, i.e. we are 6th on the list. However, we are 4th in line asking for a girl.......AND the first 2 families on the list are asking for multiple children, so they could obviously get girls as well (I believe they are both open to gender). So, I realistically could be like 6th in line for a girl. From this I gather it would be pretty unlikely to get a referral in the next batch, still could happen, but my expectations won't be there. Also, I asked if I should just get through the holidays and the New Year before even thinking again about getting one and the answer was pretty much- that's a good idea, you won't be getting a referral any time soon. A bummer, but a gift to have the understanding of where I am in line!
So, now I feel so relieved to just know the deal. It is so dissapointing that I will be waiting several more months, but at least I can reset my expectaitions and if something happens sooner, great, but I won't be frustrated not knowing what's going on anymore or being upset each Friday when I heard nothing.
I am so thankful that my coordinator was willing to share this information and allow me to literally dig into everything she said. I know again that this is in God's timing and it will all be worth it in the end.
Praying for families to have success on Dec. 7 and praying for the second group of families to have their date VERY soon after!! You guys have been doing so good hanging in there, you're almost there!
I had a great conversation with our family coordinator yesterday and feel I learned of several things that are so helpful in this journey of the unknown. Knowing ANYTHING helps the wait and the anticipaition and the planning. Gaining a better understanding of how things are working and moving forward has helped me SOOOO much. Even though the news is not exactly what my heart wants, that's o.k. because it is all in His timing and I am trusting fully in that. So, especially for you YG friends I hope this sheds some light and clarity for you as well. I think if anything we will have a better way of watching and gauging how and when referrals might come along.
-The agency's main focus right now is to get all the referred families through their court dates successfully. I completelly agree that this has to be the main focus. So after Dec. 7, G-man will be focused on getting the 2nd group their dates, and probably preparing for the first group to travel. I asked if there would be any referrals in between those two court dates. The answer is most likely no, but possibly. It really seems to depend on the workload of G-man and if he feels he has the bandwidth to do that. Again, his focus will be on the first 2 groups of families.
-It sounds like G-man has hired some staff to help him (YEAH!!!) and he will be gettting them ready so that he can eventually task them with some of the things he has had to do, thus giving them the opportunity to do more things simultaneously (This is my interpretation). I will be praying that he finds this great staff and if they are already hired, than I pray for their ability and their hearts for how much good and help they are providing. Also, so that G-man doesn't have to be the one man show (must be exhausting)
-O.K., so IF there was time to do some referrals in December (again, sounds unlikely), there would only be able to be 4 children referred. The transitional home holds up to 16 babies.....there are 12 there now. I asked why not have referrals come as soon as court dates start happening successfully and those new referred babies would stay at the original orphanages for a short time, as they did before the TH. I learned this is not possible as ET adoption guidlines state that an agaency MUST have a transitional home. They are not allowed to stay at the orphanges as soon as they are referred. There is a grace period given to the agencies when they begin working with ET, America World's grace period is over, and great thing that our transitional home is up and running (probably why their haven't been more referrals as G-man was again the main person setting this home up and now we know it was probably pretty time-critical). So, if there are 16 children in the TH they are not even able to get more referrals. So, for us waiting families and those who will be there soon, this is a great piece of information as we can watch the TH for children leaving/coming to better gauge the flow of more referrals. Also, Rachel is there now helping and when she moves there, this home will no longer be on G-man's plate. Also, as G-man gets his new staff up and running, their hope is to eventually have things going really smoothly and the TH home will essentaully have a revloving door as famlies come get their little angels and new referrals enter.
-I also know exactly where I am on the waiting list, not only by # dossier submitted but, what the requests are before me. We were the 21st dossier submitted, i.e. we are 6th on the list. However, we are 4th in line asking for a girl.......AND the first 2 families on the list are asking for multiple children, so they could obviously get girls as well (I believe they are both open to gender). So, I realistically could be like 6th in line for a girl. From this I gather it would be pretty unlikely to get a referral in the next batch, still could happen, but my expectations won't be there. Also, I asked if I should just get through the holidays and the New Year before even thinking again about getting one and the answer was pretty much- that's a good idea, you won't be getting a referral any time soon. A bummer, but a gift to have the understanding of where I am in line!
So, now I feel so relieved to just know the deal. It is so dissapointing that I will be waiting several more months, but at least I can reset my expectaitions and if something happens sooner, great, but I won't be frustrated not knowing what's going on anymore or being upset each Friday when I heard nothing.
I am so thankful that my coordinator was willing to share this information and allow me to literally dig into everything she said. I know again that this is in God's timing and it will all be worth it in the end.
Praying for families to have success on Dec. 7 and praying for the second group of families to have their date VERY soon after!! You guys have been doing so good hanging in there, you're almost there!
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
I am looking forward to laughing
Today's many thoughts:
-With court delays going on in Ethiopia, there is news that our ever-anticipated referral will not come anytime soon. Here we were waiting day to day with great hope that "the call" was coming..........last night was great news mixed with sad news.
-One of the referral groups got their new court dates which is such great news. My heart has been with them and not knowing how hard it must be to have a picture in hand and just waiting to get the chance to go get them! I am praying that December 7th is a glorious day, and I am so excited that they have movement on their process.
-My heart feels for the second referral batch who won't even get their new court dates until the first group goes through. I pray that they all have news of success and completion by Christmas or the New Year! I also pray for their patience and peace during this time of waiting. God will hold thier babies in his hands and will also do his work in their hearts to get them through.
-I am left to wonder when we can even think of getting our referral. I have gone from feeling so close and excited, to feeling like this process and phase will go on and on and on and on and on.........I know our news will come, and I know it will just bring me to the next phase which I am seeing is also not that easy; however it will be THE NEXT PHASE. I am ready for a new set of waiting issues. I felt like this as we were approaching the end of the paper-chase. Each phase is a higher quality problem. I am hoping to get some information from our agency tomorrow that will help me better understand and grasp the delays that we may be experiencing. I just need to know if we have to now wait until all families fully get through their court dates for anymore referrals. I will be fine either way, just need a sense of direction and help to better set my expectations and ability to wait. Boy have I grown so much through this process, I felt last night like God is really getting me ready for something AMAZING. I never doubted this experience and having another child would be incredible, but I get the feeling there will be more to it than I could have even thought of. Maybe he is going to give us the gift of twins (we have requested an infant girl or twins), or maybe we will experience something so amazing that our lives will so be changed and we are able to give more than we ever thought and make a huge difference for children, or maybe it is just the gift of the growth of my heart, my soul and my faith.
-People talk of the miracle of birth........how about the miracle of adoption!
-My dear husband sent this to me today. It is so right on I had to post it..........and that concludes my thoughts for the day.......I think that is enough, don't you?
"The Lord said to Abraham, 'Why did Sarah laugh.'" Genesis 18:13 NIV
You'll laugh again!
In Genesis 18:13-14 we read: "The Lord said to Abraham, 'Why did Sarah laugh and say, 'Will I really have a child, now that I am old?' Is anything too hard for the Lord?'" Then in Genesis 21:2 we read: "Sarah became pregnant and bore a son...[and] said, 'God has brought me laughter'" (Ge 21:2-6 NIV). But between the first and the last laugh Sarah went through a wrenching time of disappointment and heartache. The 'love of her life,' Abraham, betrayed her to save himself. Abimelech, a heathen king, took her to his harem and would have slept with her had God not stepped in to rescue her. Yes, like Sarah, between the first laugh and the last you'll do a lot of growing. You'll celebrate your good times and pray for grace to survive your bad ones. Some days you'll feel like you can't go a step further, yet through it all you'll learn to trust God more than you ever dreamed possible.
Here's an important thought: when you share your story with others don't just tell how you started or where you are today, tell them what God brought you through. Why? For those are the things they are struggling with too! King Abimelech's tent was in Gerar, which means the halting place. There will be times when you'll feel as if your life has come to a complete halt; like you're getting nowhere. Maybe that's where you are today. If it is, please know this - God will be faithful to you! Not only will He bring you through, but like Sarah, you'll laugh again as you watch Him fulfill His promises in your life!
-With court delays going on in Ethiopia, there is news that our ever-anticipated referral will not come anytime soon. Here we were waiting day to day with great hope that "the call" was coming..........last night was great news mixed with sad news.
-One of the referral groups got their new court dates which is such great news. My heart has been with them and not knowing how hard it must be to have a picture in hand and just waiting to get the chance to go get them! I am praying that December 7th is a glorious day, and I am so excited that they have movement on their process.
-My heart feels for the second referral batch who won't even get their new court dates until the first group goes through. I pray that they all have news of success and completion by Christmas or the New Year! I also pray for their patience and peace during this time of waiting. God will hold thier babies in his hands and will also do his work in their hearts to get them through.
-I am left to wonder when we can even think of getting our referral. I have gone from feeling so close and excited, to feeling like this process and phase will go on and on and on and on and on.........I know our news will come, and I know it will just bring me to the next phase which I am seeing is also not that easy; however it will be THE NEXT PHASE. I am ready for a new set of waiting issues. I felt like this as we were approaching the end of the paper-chase. Each phase is a higher quality problem. I am hoping to get some information from our agency tomorrow that will help me better understand and grasp the delays that we may be experiencing. I just need to know if we have to now wait until all families fully get through their court dates for anymore referrals. I will be fine either way, just need a sense of direction and help to better set my expectations and ability to wait. Boy have I grown so much through this process, I felt last night like God is really getting me ready for something AMAZING. I never doubted this experience and having another child would be incredible, but I get the feeling there will be more to it than I could have even thought of. Maybe he is going to give us the gift of twins (we have requested an infant girl or twins), or maybe we will experience something so amazing that our lives will so be changed and we are able to give more than we ever thought and make a huge difference for children, or maybe it is just the gift of the growth of my heart, my soul and my faith.
-People talk of the miracle of birth........how about the miracle of adoption!
-My dear husband sent this to me today. It is so right on I had to post it..........and that concludes my thoughts for the day.......I think that is enough, don't you?
"The Lord said to Abraham, 'Why did Sarah laugh.'" Genesis 18:13 NIV
You'll laugh again!
In Genesis 18:13-14 we read: "The Lord said to Abraham, 'Why did Sarah laugh and say, 'Will I really have a child, now that I am old?' Is anything too hard for the Lord?'" Then in Genesis 21:2 we read: "Sarah became pregnant and bore a son...[and] said, 'God has brought me laughter'" (Ge 21:2-6 NIV). But between the first and the last laugh Sarah went through a wrenching time of disappointment and heartache. The 'love of her life,' Abraham, betrayed her to save himself. Abimelech, a heathen king, took her to his harem and would have slept with her had God not stepped in to rescue her. Yes, like Sarah, between the first laugh and the last you'll do a lot of growing. You'll celebrate your good times and pray for grace to survive your bad ones. Some days you'll feel like you can't go a step further, yet through it all you'll learn to trust God more than you ever dreamed possible.
Here's an important thought: when you share your story with others don't just tell how you started or where you are today, tell them what God brought you through. Why? For those are the things they are struggling with too! King Abimelech's tent was in Gerar, which means the halting place. There will be times when you'll feel as if your life has come to a complete halt; like you're getting nowhere. Maybe that's where you are today. If it is, please know this - God will be faithful to you! Not only will He bring you through, but like Sarah, you'll laugh again as you watch Him fulfill His promises in your life!
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
Got Milk!
I have not addressed this issue on my blog as of yet, even though it has been a major part of my journey these days.......but I am so happy with how things are going that I have decided to share, hoping that this will incourage someone else or help another mommy know it is possible.
I decided months ago that I wanted to nurse my new baby. I nursed my first two and why should I not try to provide the same nourishment, protection and boost for my third baby. Well, one might say........maybe because I am not pregnant and not carrying this child? I had researched online and talked to several women who had done this and learned it is completely possible. I scheduled an appt. with my Dr. next as I thought I should discuss with him, and I read that I would need to be on the pill for a couple months first (all part of the protocol) The nurse AND practitioner at my ob/gyn had never come across this request (you know I was feeling like a lunitic that day). They were very confused as to why I was there asking for the pill, and wanting to nurse, WHEN I was not preganant AND asking for the pill!!! It was comical the looks on there faces....I can laugh now. They were telling me nicely "honey, the pill is used to avoid getting pregnant, not to nurse" Long story short, they called in the big guns. They got on the the phone with the Certified lactation group working in labor & delivery at the hospital. They said, sure she can nurse without being pregnant, and assured the practitioner that indeed the pill is used to put one's body into a "pregnent-like" state to prepare for the relactation. OH, THANK GOD I thought, someone doesn't think I am crazy. What I learned was that it is totally possible to relactate, or even do it for the first time if you have never had a pregnancy.
So, I have been pumping now for 2 months and have about 400 ounces frozen in our freezer!! I am just so thrilled and amazed that a woman's body can do this. Knowing that my little girl and maybe little boy are with us on this earth and in the care of others is hard for a mom. Each time I sit down to pump I know that I am doing everything I can to give Gabrielle the best of what a mom can give. When she comes home she will receive this milk that was prepared for her months before and it will make this mom feel so good. I couldn't give her my body for pregnancy, but in my heart she has lived; however giving her my body for her nourishment feels great!
Adoption is so emotional and spiritual. We connect to these little ones through God with our hearts and minds. So far my experience with adoptive nursing is that it brings such a wonderful physical component to adoption which has meant a lot to me. I can't even imagine if when I get my baby she actually is willing t nurse on me, that will be a whole added experience of bonding.
I decided months ago that I wanted to nurse my new baby. I nursed my first two and why should I not try to provide the same nourishment, protection and boost for my third baby. Well, one might say........maybe because I am not pregnant and not carrying this child? I had researched online and talked to several women who had done this and learned it is completely possible. I scheduled an appt. with my Dr. next as I thought I should discuss with him, and I read that I would need to be on the pill for a couple months first (all part of the protocol) The nurse AND practitioner at my ob/gyn had never come across this request (you know I was feeling like a lunitic that day). They were very confused as to why I was there asking for the pill, and wanting to nurse, WHEN I was not preganant AND asking for the pill!!! It was comical the looks on there faces....I can laugh now. They were telling me nicely "honey, the pill is used to avoid getting pregnant, not to nurse" Long story short, they called in the big guns. They got on the the phone with the Certified lactation group working in labor & delivery at the hospital. They said, sure she can nurse without being pregnant, and assured the practitioner that indeed the pill is used to put one's body into a "pregnent-like" state to prepare for the relactation. OH, THANK GOD I thought, someone doesn't think I am crazy. What I learned was that it is totally possible to relactate, or even do it for the first time if you have never had a pregnancy.
So, I have been pumping now for 2 months and have about 400 ounces frozen in our freezer!! I am just so thrilled and amazed that a woman's body can do this. Knowing that my little girl and maybe little boy are with us on this earth and in the care of others is hard for a mom. Each time I sit down to pump I know that I am doing everything I can to give Gabrielle the best of what a mom can give. When she comes home she will receive this milk that was prepared for her months before and it will make this mom feel so good. I couldn't give her my body for pregnancy, but in my heart she has lived; however giving her my body for her nourishment feels great!
Adoption is so emotional and spiritual. We connect to these little ones through God with our hearts and minds. So far my experience with adoptive nursing is that it brings such a wonderful physical component to adoption which has meant a lot to me. I can't even imagine if when I get my baby she actually is willing t nurse on me, that will be a whole added experience of bonding.
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
The Endurance we need for the marathon of Adoption
I found this on another blog (Mary- Owlhaven) and had to share it. It is SO fitting for those of us in the various stages of adoption. There are those days spent struggling through paperwork that seems to never end, the endurance that it takes to wait,wait and then wait some more for that call to come. Then the call and picture of your beloved child is seen in reality and not just in heart! Then waiting again for the moment you can officailly call that child yours. Then the ultimate wait begins........getting to the day of actually holding and kissing that blessing of a child. We were all purposely chosen and put on this path, our reward will come, but not without running the marathon first. It is too big of a reward to be given lightly and easily. Enjoy!
Hebrews 10:35-36
“So do not throw away your confidence, because it has great reward. For you need endurance in order to do God’s will and so receive what is promised.”
Absorb what it’s saying. God has made us certain promises that we will only see fulfilled on the other side of a demanding climb. We’re going to have to sweat this one out and feel the burn in our limbs but the reward is going to be “great.” There is something God wants to give you, Beloved, but He’s purposely requiring tremendous perseverance from you in order for you to have what it takes to receive it rightly. Humbly. You will need ENDURANCE to do His will in this particular situation. It will not come easy because it’s too good to come cheap.
Without Christ you can do nothing but, with Him, you are capable of things you’ve never dreamed. All surpassing power abides in your jar of clay. Do not shrink back. The God of the Universe looked the world over and found you.
Friday, November 2, 2007
Let God be God of the Future
So friends, I get a daily devotional and today's was EXACTLY what I needed. It can be hard to wait on news of our baby/babies, and trying to keep faith and our hearts in line. This devotional was so helpful for me I wanted to share it:
For I know the thoughts and plans that I have for you, says the Lord, thoughts and plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you hope in your final outcome. Jeremiah 29:11
God has a plan and a purpose for each of us and a specific way and perfect time to bring it to pass.
Much of our frustration and misery comes from either not believing that fact, or believing it but being determined to do things our own way and in our own time, determined to exalt our own will and timing above God's.
According to Isaiah 55:8, God's thoughts are not our thoughts, and His ways are not our ways. We want what feels good right now, but God has something far greater in mind.
We are constantly trying to figure out something we do not understand or trying to make something happen now that is not happening yet. It seems as if we are always trying, but believers are supposed to believe!
"Why, God, why?" and "When, God, when?" can be two statements that keep us frustrated and prevent us from enjoying peace. Many times we do not understand what God is doing. But that is what trust is all about. Let God be God in your life. Give Him the reins. He knows what He is doing.
Do This:
Trust yourself and everything to God Who judges fairly and deals righteously. Deposit yourself in His hands and watch what He can do!
www.joycemeyer.org
For I know the thoughts and plans that I have for you, says the Lord, thoughts and plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you hope in your final outcome. Jeremiah 29:11
God has a plan and a purpose for each of us and a specific way and perfect time to bring it to pass.
Much of our frustration and misery comes from either not believing that fact, or believing it but being determined to do things our own way and in our own time, determined to exalt our own will and timing above God's.
According to Isaiah 55:8, God's thoughts are not our thoughts, and His ways are not our ways. We want what feels good right now, but God has something far greater in mind.
We are constantly trying to figure out something we do not understand or trying to make something happen now that is not happening yet. It seems as if we are always trying, but believers are supposed to believe!
"Why, God, why?" and "When, God, when?" can be two statements that keep us frustrated and prevent us from enjoying peace. Many times we do not understand what God is doing. But that is what trust is all about. Let God be God in your life. Give Him the reins. He knows what He is doing.
Do This:
Trust yourself and everything to God Who judges fairly and deals righteously. Deposit yourself in His hands and watch what He can do!
www.joycemeyer.org
Thursday, November 1, 2007
Neighborhood fun and trick or treating
Our neigborhood has a party every Halloween and all the adults and kids dress up. We decorate a hayride for the kids and take them around the neighborhood (houses are pretty far apart) to get candy and have fun. This year John wanted to be Spiderman and Isabelle wanted to be Super Girl. They came up with the idea that mommy and daddy should be matching them. I actually found adult matching costumes and we had a ball!!!
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